How Michelle Phan comes up with this name is genius, but now I feel there's a need to use these words as the title of this post. There were a bunch of broken sentences whispering in my head when I was taking a shower. Well, they didn't come without a cause, but, just read on.
I have always made a mistake that people will treat me the way I treat them. I don't rob, but I got robbed, I should have taken that as a lesson that my belief doesn't work with people, at least many of them. I should have a better way to deal with those people instead of feeling disappointed that I have treated them too nice that they couldn't return the treatment.
There are some hurtful words that you wish you wouldn't have heard, but was said and heard anyway. Is it too much that I could freely react to what I hate/dislike or feel uncomfortable with? Is it an obligation that I have to like what the person close to me like? NO! You have your value and I have mine. Sometimes I just need the courage to look at the person in the face and say 'I have the freedom to feel about things, don't tell me how should I feel about anything. If you don't like seeing me like that, go away or get rid of me.', but I don't, my words are flat and cold, sometimes I feel they don't deserve it.... at least not yet.
Some people who have known me for a long time know the gentle, sensitive, quiet, positive side of me. They haven't seen or rarely see the darker side of me, it's because they don't deserve it. I save it for people who really deserve it. People said I've changed, probably so, and probably not. It's just that the older I get, the more experience I have, my values and views about people and the world have been attacked too many times, and I haven't found the perfect balance yet, or maybe spending this whole life still haven't found. But saying so doesn't mean that I give up my values, they are still the big parts that shape me to who I am today.
I have a lot more to say, but let me end it here for now. Good night, readers. May your days ahead be brighter than mine.
P.S: you may find the title and the content in the post are not quite related, I just like the title so why can't I put it as a title, this blog is about me anyway.
I accidentally find this on Google, give it a listen. Cher is good